This Life we are called to live, it is good.
This God we know and serve, He is good.
I swivel my chair from side to side - thinking. I find it hard to believe that one girl could be so, so blessed. My heart is crying just thinking about it, and I am thankful. My God loves me.
August was a phenomenal month. God tore me open in so many ways, and then turned around and healed me. He spoke truth and direction and encouragement. I am recognizing again the value of hard times. The beauty in brokenness. The unspeakable joy in pain. The peace of God in confusion. It is such a perfect place to be. As I have talked to friends who have been going through hard things themselves I see it in them too. It is exciting. God is at work and that usually means ripping away masks, pulling down walls, and thrusting outside of comfort zones… but it is so exciting!
I have been thinking lately about the exceptional group of friends I have. I have talked to quite a few people recently who have a "good group of friends" but nothing like the encouraging group of girls I have who make me smile and laugh so easily, are the first to call me on an error, will not let me believe for a moment that it's ok to give up or live a mediocre life, point me to God with every breath, love me no matter what, and love God so much more.
My family is amazing. I know people say that about their families all the time, but I've been realizing it afresh about mine. My parents are so balanced and trusting and fun and wise. They let me live my life, but want to be a part of it. They are great fun to have discussions with about deep topics. They let me make my own choices but are always there to offer advice. They treat me as if they enjoy being around me. My brothers are pretty amazing too. Jon is the one I can always be real with and will never freak out. He intuitively knows when I'm having a bad day. He balances my impetuous and passionate ideas and always makes me feel loved. Ben makes me laugh. He has deep thoughts to share and is passionate about important things. He loves to have fun and we plan to buy guns and learn to dance together amidst our crazy school schedules. The little guys are just a blast to hang out with and will not be "the little guys" much longer.
I sit here and bask in the joy and amazement of my blessings. It's such a warm feeling. But I don't want to just sit here. I want to use it. "To whom much is given much more shall be required." I have a dream. I have a vision. I have something worth working toward. Something I feel God has called me to. I want to use what I have been given to pour the love and power of Jesus Christ into the lives of others.
What does that look like? I have some ideas. I should blog about them soon.
May the Lamb who was slain receive the reward for His suffering.
